A lot has happened in the past 4 years….big things…..sad things. So. Much. Loss. Things that have affected me greatly. Things that I've had trouble getting past. Things that apparently I'm still grieving.
All of these things have accumulated and have turned me into a Negative Nancy.
I am aware of it (and have been for quite some time) and I don't like it. Starting this year, I want to change that so my One Little Word this year is:
I've had this word chosen for a while now but wasn't clear on why I couldn't get it out of my head. It wasn't until very recently that I had my aha moment.
In researching the difference between happiness and joy, I came across this definition of spiritual joy that really struck me…
"Joy is the settled assurance that God is in control of all the details of my life, the quiet confidence that ultimately everything is going to be alright, and the determined choice to praise God in every situation."
Wow. These are things I know and recite to myself (and sometimes to others) frequently. The question is, do I really believe this. The answer is a resounding "YES!" The problem is, it's more head belief than heart belief.
I have joy. I feel joy. Those that know me (or think they know me) may not believe it because they can't see it past all the negativity that often comes spewing out of me. I know I'm blessed, I know my situation(s) could be worse. NONE of that is lost on me. Trust me.
So going forward….starting here and now….I want the joy to outshine the negativity. This is not going to be easy for me and for those who are closest to me, I ask that you give me lots of grace in this area. After all, I've been stuck in this pattern of negativity for a long time. I've allowed it to consume me and getting rid of it is going to take quite a bit of work. However, there's no way I can do it alone. There's only One who can get me through this.
I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world. [I have deprived it of power to harm you and have conquered it for you.] -John 16:33 AMP
…..the JOY of the Lord is my strength. -Nehemiah 8.10
But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness & self control. -Galatians 5.22
So that's my One Little Word and my main goal for 2015.